(In Loving Memory of N.L Chirata 1933-2007)
My soul weeps…from an invisible bleeding sore
Salient soul oceanic turbulent waves form fuming foam
Dulling my mind into autopilot senselessness
An unseen dark cloud suppresses my heart
A pinprick reminder opens floodgates –
a relentless downpour of grief.
Not knowing my left from my right…
Not knowing where I am going and where I’m coming from
Not seeing the glory of sunrise…in its purity
Nor the yellow…melting into orange – beauty of sunset
Daytime nightmares sleepwalk and morph into dark nights
I am lost…life has become a silent noise.
Like a flower that does not wither
Blooming forever in my heart
Caressing its intangible insides with warm memories
Joys I painfully embrace because none can be added
from behind that door that no one can ever open again.
Voice, touch, laugh…aura, scent…I feel you, I breathe you,
a grand presence.
In the loud silence of your absence…you still speak
Laughter here is foreign
Fumbling, stumbling and tumbling with decoy joys
Food tasting like wood shavings
My tongue cries in sympathy with my heart
As I wait to be unbroken from this brokenness.
Pauline Chirata Mukondiwa grew up in Highfield, Harare in a family of nine. She has three children and two grandchildren. Pauline is a farmer and a keen waterwise gardener who enjoys travelling, meeting new people and getting to know their land, life and foods. Tasting indigenous cuisine is a must in her travels. Throw in some birdwatching and its bliss for Pauline. She loves a quiet space with a pen and a paper where she can dream.